There are common mistakes that, if not avoided, can terminate a promising relationship. Here I’m going to unveil some of those mistakes and provide you with tips on how to avoid them and enjoy a healthy and lasting relationship. Let’s begin.
10 Mistakes to Be Avoided in a Relationship
1.Not taking Communication Seriously
Just like salt is the major ingredient that gives our food taste, communication remains the main ingredient which guarantee the success of any relationship. The importance of Communication in a relationship can never be overemphasized, especially new one. In other to build a healthy and lasting relationship, effective communication must be utilized between the partners to understand themselves better, know their needs and find ways to amicably resolve conflicts.
It’s a mistake if you do not open up in a relationship to express your your thought, feelings and wants. Effective communication helps you to understand your partner and empathize with them. Communication is a good skill for resolving misunderstanding.
In a conflicting situation, for instance, partners need to express their dissatisfaction, finding ways to understand each other rather than blaming one another between who is wrong and who’s not. By Communicating, they find a common ground to resolve their conflict.
2. Neglecting Core Differences
In the early beginning of a relationship, we tend to tolerate some major differences. This happens probably because we feel we are just getting to know each other and need some time to study the person we are interested in the more. You must define your values and worldview to be sure that they align with the person you are interested in.
Neglecting major differences in a relationship can cause strain in the relationship in the long run. Having a partner who share the same value and worldview helps to eliminate conflict and sustain a lasting healthy relationship. Do not make a mistake of relying on your emotion of love and sex to commit to someone; it might not last. This is because love can be fleeting, but value will keep the relationship going when love emotion is gone.
3. Avoiding Your Friends
One of the greatest mistake we are often tempted to make in a new relationship is trying to avoid our friends when we found ourselves in a love relationship. Some people do this probably to have time to enjoy their relationship and avoid interference of friends. But, unfortunately, relationship is full of ups and downs. We need the support of friends and family in the form of advice and emotional support when difficulties arise.
Heartbreak is inevitable in a relationship, so you need your friends and family should there be any negative eventuality. It’s wrong to isolate yourself while in a new relationship. Importantly, while in a relationship, make sure you maintain other relationships for your well-being.
4. Being Dishonest to Your Partner
The basis of relationship is trust. And the basis of trust is honesty. Not being honest in a relationship is an unhealthy virtue. You must truthfully Communicate your feelings, needs and thoughts to your partner without giving any room or entertaining any form of judgement and criticism. This is because honesty cannot exist where you don’t know the state of the mind of your partner and vice versa. Keeping any secret or anything from your partner will certainly surface to negatively impact the relationship.
5. Tolerating Bad Behavior
We are often tempted and blinded by emotions to accepting, in the beginning, ill behavior from our partner. This is a huge mistake because we set standard as to how we would be treated in the future, by condoning ill behavior from our partner.
Communicate your partner from the outset what you need in the relationship and what you don’t tolerate. Though it’s difficult to do at that early stage, but doing that will save you from disrespect and degradation. For example, if you notice any bad behavior from your partner, such as name-calling or shouting at you, speak to them about it how you can’t tolerate such uncultured behavior. And if they can’t heed to it, it’s a red flag that you can’t ignore.
6. Not Considering Your Relationship a Priority
Relationship is like a business; if you fail to prioritize it and invest your time and resources on it, be sure of its collapse. You must invest your your time in your relationship to ensure its success. Use your Communication skills to ensure that everyone is satisfied and ensure that you are on the same page with your partner.
Loving someone is not enough to sustain a relationship. Put in efforts if you want your relationship to be healthy and last.
7. Being Insensitive to Your Partner’s Perspective
One of the enemies of relationship is perception. While you hold your view, be sensitive to your partner’s point of view to understand and empathize with them. This will help to eliminate conflicts and enable you to resolve misunderstanding.
In a conflict situation, Communicate with your partner and try to see things from their own view. It’s a mistake to always claim to be right all the times. Openly and sincerely accept that you are wrong whenever you err. This will not ensure peace in your relationship, but it will attract more respect to you.
8. The Feeling of Insecurity
Feeling insecure in a relationship is a sign that we are in love, but it’s destructive if we do not control it. It’s important to define what you want to know where you stand in the relationship, as doing so would help clear your insecurity.
Get to know the person you are interested in. Take your time to study them and ensure the person can be trusted. Once this is established, the insecurity will disappear.
9. Living in Your Experience
You must let go your past to accommodate the present and define your future. Some people often carry their past heartbreaks, hurt and disappointment they suffered in their previous relationships into their present relationship, not letting the past remain in the past. They do this to protect themselves against possible future heartbreak. Some of them transfer the anger and frustration towards the new person they entered into a relationship with. This is unhealthy and be avoided.
This is a big mistake that can scare potential Partners away, making it impossible to build a new relationship. Heal and let go of your past. You can see a therapist for treatment and counseling. Do not let the trauma of your past relationship experience ruin your chance of building another healthy and lasting relationship.
10. Not Being Faithful
Unfaithfulness is a relationship is one of the easily made mistake. But it’s a mistake we can intentionally avoid through self-discipline. You must endeavor to be loyal, committed and faithful to your partner no matter. Nobody tolerate a cheating partner. Cheating is a canker worm that destroys relationships.
There are people who resort to talking to another person such as their ex-lover whenever they have problem with their partners. Communicating with an ex-lover in this state may lead to cheating. So, whenever you have any misunderstanding with your spouse or Partner, talk to them about it rather than resorting to an ex-lover for emotional support.
Read Also: 10 Essential Factors to Consider Before Getting Married
Conclusion
Mastering the above mistakes people make in a relationship will no doubt help to avoid making similar ones in your relationship. It’s true that relationship can be tricky and daunting, but with the above mistakes recognized and put into check, you can master relationship skills and build a healthy and lasting relationship.
